Thursday, July 21, 2011

HOW TO PRIORITIZE?


 In today's fast-paced world, the phrase ‘to prioritize’ has gained a currency.
We say that it is required to keep up with all sectors of our lives to be dealt with. We keep a list of dos and don't s. And the list keeps changing with respect to both its elements and the elements’ ranks in the list.
More and more of our generation are becoming career-oriented. And there the bell of prioritizing rings!!.. As otherwise, we will be left behind and we don’t like to lose!!

It is in the recent years that the need of networking(socializing)  has increased manifold and has gained a status of ‘being indispensable’ for ‘survival’, the new ‘having a successful and reputed life’, in this kaleidoscopic world of Facebook and twitter..!
And as we increasingly pander to these requirements, the respective spaces for the priorities in the priority list reduce to such an extent that we tend to forget their respective ranks.
For instance, there is a young recently married, lovely couple that one of my friends know. Now the guy (the husband) has been staying abroad for quite some time and intends to stay there for another year or so, in order to escalate his career prospects, so that he can serve his family in a better way, i.e; his topmost priority is his family and not the career.
But,what if in the mean time, his career takes the topmost priority!! Who can assure that it doesn’t go the other way round in this indefinite article like world where nothing is certain? Now that’s debatable..!
Is there a solution to it ( if you ever consider it as a problem..!!)?
Today, even we might prioritize say, our career over other things in the name of prioritizing something else!!
Now, a child is never a priority to his/her parents because the child is not just an entity to them.A mother doesn’t really prioritize feeding her child or to be there for her child…she simply does it.
Why?
Because she has to do it; she loves doing it; it need not be stated in a priority list, in any list whatsoever!!
So here comes the solution. Perhaps, the solution circulates around the fact that it is not just about how to prioritize but also what to prioritize. Just like a mother does not have to prioritize a child, a husband or a wife need not prioritize his/ her spouse. They cannot compare their spouse with other people or with other Important entities in their lives. They can individually be a part of priority lists of other people(in their so called networks), but not a part of each others' ‘the list’.
So placing your family on such a list, becomes as tricky as playing a trick of mixing pearl and fish eye, in later stages of our lives. You can’t really prioritize your family among other things. You can only choose between the two - having a family(one can define family as per his/her wish) and not having the family. They(family) need not be prioritized at all because of the way we do. Let’s not say that we prioritize our families. They are our families-and their importance need not be explicated!!
As for me, I do not want to be ever reduced to even, so-called, the topmost priority of my parents or my husband’s (once I get married) in future…because priorities always change….and Life is like a series of marathons in which no participant secures the first position always.....!!






36 comments:

  1. Well quite a thoughtful post and it goes mostly for those who actually prioritize things and people in their lives to all the more complicate things, in the process!
    At the end of the day, the fact remains , no one takes decision in favour of others, be it family , girlfriend/boyfriend, or work ! Everyone somewhere or the other is selfish. Even the most honest of an army officer who would have died while defending his nation is doing it for his own happiness.. the only difference is that we may not understand this as our priority is someone or something else!
    Priority is Selfishness and Selfishness is Human ! :)

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    Replies
    1. revelation of another grey shade of human beings...rightly said..
      keep reading :)

      Delete
    2. I agree with the first line here. To complicate is a different act than prioritizing. I, very blatantly, admit to be of the former sect. Seriously, I need help! And this post, Sakshi, helped me in someway or the other I guess!

      My prioritizing goes in tandem with my career and hobbies. However, I have a different enemy. I call him Procrastination! Waiting for a post on it from you soon!! Well written!

      PS: Here, I go, and follow you. :)

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    3. I'm glad I was some help to you. And yes we share that enemy!
      Will try to write something on that once I figure out something about it.
      Any way thank you :)
      keep reading, and sharing your views :)

      Delete
  2. Nice post :)
    Makes perfect sense. You have your family in place and then you prioritize everything else around it. Period.
    The moment you put family on any sort of "priority list" you're on a very slippery slope!

    Regards
    AKY

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    Replies
    1. absolutely right AKY..you got it right...!!
      family and priority list are two separate domains with almost no overlaps..!!
      Thank You and Keep reading :):)

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  3. Well written article, expressing your views clearly with that example. But please do leave line spaces between paragraphs, it is easier on the eye.

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    Replies
    1. thank you :)
      and i'll try a different line spacing next time i post an article..!!

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  4. A thought provoking post....loved reading it!

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  5. Replies
    1. I;m glad you liked it:)
      keep reading and your comments are always awaited.. :)

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  6. no doubt priorities change from time to time.BUT ITS REALLY NECESSARY to priorities coz u gain more focus in doing things dat really counts.
    Its said "NEVER MAJOR IN THE MINOR" thats what priorities helps us in doing staying focused. And offcourse we cant priorities family .
    anywyas gud read :)

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    Replies
    1. yes..i agree with you entirely..
      thank you :)

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  7. Priorities help us keep our life on track... I loved the opening quote... We have to prioritize life over things... Its important to look at people over things... Easily said but difficult to do!
    Well Written!

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    Replies
    1. Yes priorities have to me made to avoid mess, but in the act of prioritizing, one shouldn't mess..
      Thank you :)
      keep reading :)

      Delete
  8. That was a good thought very much significant in this modern world..

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  9. I completely agree. Unless we prioritise and focus on the things that needs to be done, it will cause havoc in terms of performance and will start affecting reputations.

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  10. Very true Sakshi and I completely agree with you. Priorities change with time and we need take control of them in order to keep everything in order :)

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  11. I agree about family and priorities... but i would like to add...

    family can easily be 'prioritised'. as long as you are willing to make it very clear to your family, they will understand your preoccupation. priorities doesnt mean amount of time. it means quality time and effort. you will have a family. whether you call them friends or relatives is a different matter.
    moreover priorities dont change situations change. lets put an example of lovers. most of the time lovers will be the top priority at the begining of a relationship. then most people complain about how their bf/gf has stopped giving them as much time as before. does it mean that the guys/ girls priorities have changed? no... it simply means that they have reached a stage of their relationship where they have now started knowing each other, the introduction phase is over... and also can support each other's other avenues, like career, education. does that mean the love has lessened? no. it just means that your focus and the situation has changed where to sustain the relationship you also need to do other things. for example have a job.

    the best relationships are those in which this understanding is there that each person has their own lives. and they need to focus on their own lives as well. it means balancing love, life, careers, children, social life and entertainment. Like you said if you love doing something you dont need to put it in any lists. im sure you did not sacrifice everyone or anything to write this wonderful blogpost.

    it was a good read....
    keep it up

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    Replies
    1. Hi..it was a very thoughtful comment, I must say..
      What you wrote is absolutely right..it's not just the time, it's the quality that matters more..the expressions, acts, promises don't change with time..a coup;e may spend 3 hours in the beginning and one hour later, but then as you said, it has to be in accordance with the situation and the requirements accordingly..and yes 'understanding' is again the most important aspect of any relationship and that again can't change with time..
      what we prioritize and the way we do it matters because that reflects a lot like whether love has lessened or not!
      family can easily be prioritized as long as everyone involved is fine with that..who's more important, parents or husband or career? can I rank them on my priority list? I can't and if i do and moreover if i let them know the apparent ranking on my priority list, that will create a mess..as you said, let situations, requirements, our promises, our love decide the quantity and quality of the time we spend together..

      keep reading and commenting..such comments make me think and write :):)

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  12. We always tend to believe our family as our top-most priority but I love the way you think, because if we make our family as a priority (even if it is top-most) then they are bound to change in future. Love your thought process and the feelings involved in them. :)

    "It is not just about how to prioritize but also what to prioritize." - I couldn't agree more.

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    1. Thank you Akshay :)
      to be prioritized and then go down on the priority list of someone is not great and hence the line..
      I'm glad you believe in the same.. :)

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  13. I prioritize things in my life but do not care much for the priorities and go ahead with the moments need.. confusing huh? ;)

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    Replies
    1. I don't prioritize people and things on a large scale as I know I won't care much for them because no one can.. too go with the moments, situations and try my best to respect my promises and responsibilities..
      and no it's not confusing..i thought a lot before writing the post, you see ;)

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  14. Prioritisation is something that we must do to survive in this fast paced world we live in.

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  15. Its a remarkable post,and the way you have presented it is just fabulous. As a reader I could relate to every point that you made. Its a bitter truth though that knowing or unknowingly we make and/or become a priority for others sometime or the other..

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