Monday, August 13, 2012

Fighting The Heavyweight




 I love talking. When there’s no one around to talk to, I talk to myself. When there’s something I need to share with someone, and can’t, I talk to myself. And so I love talking.
Most of the times something or other goes on in my mind and so when I cannot talk, I write. So I love writing. I need to pour out my thoughts or else I feel flooded; flooded with my own thoughts.  And floods remind me of nature. I see my thoughts’, my feelings’ reflection in the nature. Those beautiful rains make us either ecstatic or forlorn; may be because we get to see what joy is and what grief is in the form of rains. It is as if there is something inside us which we know exists, but can’t define. I mean those feelings do exist. It’s just that they need to be manifested in some physical form for me to witness them; in a smile on our face for others to see, and in the nature for us to see.
And so I look outside and search for tangible forms of all that is intangible, there inside me to be viewed, appreciated, criticised and analysed by me..!

Words for me are like a mirror. I can see myself. I can read myself and so I can come closer to myself and love myself consciously.
So as I said when there are too much of things going on in one’s mind, it’s better to dispense them. In my case I have to do it. In my third year of college, a professor mistakenly gave me detention (wherein I was barred from sitting through exams) in two of my subjects. It obviously worried me a lot and I knew that there was no use of worrying. But I was not able to control my worrying and was feeling bullied by my thoughts. I tried to emasculate them and so I scribbled the following lines on a rough sheet of paper:

So this moment gains weight
as many thoughts proliferate
This is not the right time
so I ask them to just wait….
But my mind has no place
nowhere to make them stay
and for a while I say,
“Please, these thoughts need some rest with such a pace
that they are incessantly moving at..”
But my plead is caged in a bubble
No one listens and it goes to waste
So I tell my thoughts in order to direct them,
“You have to go far, very far, and so go, segregate..”
And they do so sincerely obeying me
in spite of knowing the fact
that I’m putting them on the wrong track
and that they ought to be together in a group to affect me,
torture me and bully me to their best
They know that I’m trying to mislead them
But they still go on different tracks..!
But how could I underestimate these thoughts
Of course, they follow my order of getting dispersed as they very well know that
they can still gain weight, enough weight
by producing some and orienting other thoughts with each of them
And so, as my efforts go in vain
this moment still gains weight..

Yes, my thoughts mushroomed and at that moment I did get worried to a certain extent, while I was jotting down the above lines, but afterwards, writing it down not just distracted me from my previous state of mind (i.e. the one before writing down the above lines), it also did make me feel better, much better!
And my efforts eventually did not go in vain and the moments felt light.
So, try out this writing exercise and disorient your thoughts whenever they try to appropriate your peace of mind. The thoughts will try their best to club themselves to get powerful, but you have to keep fighting and trust me you will succeed in the end. So don’t let such worrisome thoughts bog you down and after you write, you will feel remarkably well.


image source: http://www.markjonespainter.com/Image%20Pages/Troubled%20Mind.htm

43 comments:

  1. That was an wonderful journey with THOUGHTS!

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  2. Hi Sakshi

    Good post...Very true, writing is a sort of meditation and medication :)

    I wrote a post on similar lines some time back ...http://jaishwrites.blogspot.sg/2012/02/feeling-angry-write-it-out.html

    DO check it out if time permits :)

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    Replies
    1. thank you :):)
      will check out your link..!!

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  3. Difficult to believe that you wrote these lines immediately when you were in that not so good mindset, I mean those are awesome lines..:) It looks like one set of thoughts are having a conversation with another set of thoughts...just gives a different perspective to thoughts...:)

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    Replies
    1. Ya, I write the best when I'm going through a difficult phase/situation and a storm of emotions..!
      and yes thank you :):) Glad you found the conversation interesting.

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  4. Loved the poem! The comment would have been too long. So I wrote this:
    http://lifesaboutexperiences.blogspot.in/2012/08/the-weight-of-thoughts.html

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  5. It's a nice blog you have here, Sakshi.
    And yes, I talk a lot, too. Sometimes with myself. And most of the times all those thoughts will manifest in the form of stories. Good to know I'm not alone. :)
    Keep writing.

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    Replies
    1. I'm glad too that I'm not alone :)
      and thank you so much :):)

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  6. Sakhi your thoughts are at your command certainly, the way you wrote:)

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  7. Wow, i like that piece of poetry! I like the way you personified -ve thoughts, and ironically they seem to be decent enough to obey you. Does that really happen? As for me sakshi, the -ve thoughts just keep coming right at me no matter how much i tell them! Guess, i should talking to them through a poem ! ;)

    Regards
    Arun Raj
    The Height of Awesomness
    http://fivefeetfiveinches.wordpress.com

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  8. Wow, i like that piece of poetry! I like the way you personified -ve thoughts, and ironically they seem to be decent enough to obey you. Does that really happen? As for me sakshi, the -ve thoughts just keep coming right at me no matter how much i tell them! Guess, i should talking to them through a poem ! ;)

    Regards
    Arun Raj
    The Height of Awesomness
    http://fivefeetfiveinches.wordpress.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. thank you Arun :)
      and yes it takes a lot to divert your thoughts and you should write a poem or something coz that way you will more focused in carving out something out of those -ve thoughts..!!
      it works for me most of the times ;)

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  9. i too talk to myself... sometimes at my workplace people even ask me, what were you murmuring.. i used to pen down sometimes, not every single thing as you do.. but for someone..!

    I write at The Wandering Thoughts

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    Replies
    1. oh..even I don't write down every single thing that flashes across my mind..that's not possible..but if it were possible, i'll definitely like to do it..!!

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    2. hi...just came across your blog and completely agree with you on the purpose of scribbling something..for me also it is a vent to release the pent up emotions and thoughts inside me...more so in times of blues and chaos inside oneself...when you have nobody around you to understand you fully..then this only acts as a relief to soul..

      btw..m enrolled in a course with you- creative problem solving,in case you remember..i also indulge in writing intermittently..i have some put up some of those on a blog..http://obscurehalte.wordpress.com/..i have not made it public yet..do comment

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    3. Hey..Hi..I'm glad you relate with the scribbling concept I've mentioned in this post..!
      I've visited your blog, read 2 interesting blog posts and made few comments.
      And do meet me in next CPS Class..!!

      Delete
  10. "So this moment gains weight
    as many thoughts proliferate
    This is not the right time
    so I ask them to just wait…."


    A true poet And A True poem.Thanks 4 sharing.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. wow..!!
      thank you so much..thank you sir for such wonderful compliment; this will definitely help me write more and better :)

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  11. Wow, you're a beautiful writer and poet. You wrote an engaging, thought-provoking post about....thoughts! :-)

    Please do visit my blog sometime.... would love to hear your lovely "thoughts" on my posts.

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    Replies
    1. hi..Thank you for all the appreciation..m glad you liked the post :)
      would love to read your posts, but it would be nice and easier if you drop a link to your blog here..!!
      thank you.

      Delete
    2. Sure, sorry about that. Here you go:

      http://shazam-srk.blogspot.com/

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    3. went through your blog..a very nice one indeed..I've dropped comments on your blog post..once again, it was an interesting read..keep writing :)

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  12. interesting post and hey, you have quite a blog. :)

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    Replies
    1. Hey..thanks again :)
      and you went through another poem..!! :)

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  13. it's really difficult to write off your state of mind when you are not up with yourself and i really appreciate the way...you put your thoughts to words...!!!

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  14. Hey, awesome lines, you exactly pin pointed how our mind behaves sometime, If only it was equipped with a switch off button....

    and yes, writing down your thoughts is great stress buster!

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    Replies
    1. Yup..You got it right and m glad u liked it :):)

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  15. Btfl lines, cant agree more....i too do the same...when thoughts are too powerful to control...jotting them down definately helps....
    Keep writing , u r gifted ...:)

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    Replies
    1. wow..thanks a lot, such comments are always motivating :):)

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  16. Well I particularly like the the last line.. I have always believed that if a person love to write than nothing could be more satisfying thn scribbling on a piece of paper.. Well said and it was one lovely poem. :)

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  17. What a relief - I actually thought it would be a weight-management post! I am glad about what I've just read!

    www.anucreations.blogspot.in

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    Replies
    1. Oh..I too am glad that you liked the post :)
      Will visit your blog definitely..!!

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